
It's National Library Week, so I probably should be doing something uplifting about books and reading.
But I'm not.
Between the nasty mom on the phone this morning (I stopped her nanny from coming twice to my program this week), the tacky basket of treats from Costco that is our administration's way of celebrating "National Library Worker Day", and the mishegosse from this recent "US News and World Report" piece touting librarianship as a "hot career" and telling people to "Forget about that image of librarian as a mousy bookworm", I am ready to rant about my job. So here are:
Important Disclaimer: Most of our patrons are wonderful
and DON'T do most of these things.
Though too damn many of them do #13!
1) They leave the stuffed animals all over the floor under the sign that says "please help your child clean up the toys"
2)They bring in food even though the signs say "no food", and then leave Cheerio crumbs all over the place for the ants.
3)They bitch and whine at me because the program is on the same day their child has preschool, or Kindermusik or Gymboree. Why-in-heck do you need my program then?
4)They bitch and whine at me because we don't have infant programs. Sigh....
5)They bitch and whine at me because they can't send the nanny in more than once a week. Especially, when the nanny is one of those who doesn't do anything while she's in the program with the child and leaves early!
This morning's phone call was about one such nanny. Little does the mom know that the first month the nanny came, she and her fellow nanny didn't even come into the program--just sat outside, yakked, and got the kids a rubber stamp on their hands.
6)They bitch and whine at me because their child is a 6 month old genius, but I won't let them come to the program for 12-24 month olds. Or because their child is a 16 month old genius, but I won't let them come to the 2 year old program.Etcetera, etcetera.....
I am firmly convinced that every child in Northern Virginia is (gag) "gifted and talented".
Except for my two of course....
7)They allow their children to:
A)...stand on chairs, especially the rocking chairs, jump on chairs and push them around the room.
B)...climb onto and crawl under bookcases, even though they're made of sharp metal, and the shelves can tumble, fully loaded with books on top of their children.
C)...run through the aisles between said bookcases. See (B) above for why this isn't so good an idea.
And since when is it acceptable to allow your children to run in a library?
D)...wander unattended in a library where we have a steady population of the homeless, the chemically addicted and the just plain crazy.
8)They don't take books home even though they come to programs weekly.
Hel-lo-oh! We're a LIBRARY, remember!
9)Or they take books home and allow their children to rip, tear or otherwise mutilate them.
10)They shove damaged books in the drop rather than fessing up to it. Or just as bad, they "mend" them at home badly and with scotch tape.
On the other hand, I had a mother bring in her adorable blond two year old with his Thomas the Tank Engine piggy bank to confess that he had cut up the edges of a book (very neatly) with scissors, and to offer me money for his heinous crime. I returned the money behind his back, his mom is buying us a replacement copy, and we all can live happily ever after.
11) They sometimes don't bring books, or DVDs back at all.
12) (Say it with me, fellow sufferers) When asked (very nicely) to stop THEIR children from doing something, they turn to their child and say "The LIBRARIAN doesn't want you to do that"
Hey, lady, discipline YOUR child and take the responsibility for it. Don't make me make you come to my house and be the heavy for SC and JR!
13)Worst of all: they come to my library for programs for years (or send the nanny in with the kid), allow me to get to care about them and their children, then disappear the minute the kid goes off to preschool and they no longer need entertainment in the mornings. And generally they don't even come back occasionally for library books.
I hate this more than anything else they do.
Because as crazy as some of the parents and caregivers make me, I love these kids......